STYLE & OVERALLS/JUMPSUITS
NON-MATERNITY
OVERALLS
JUMPSUITS
MATERNITY
OVERALLS
HATCH JUMPSUIT PICKS
MRS. NIPPLE OVERALL & JUMPSUIT PICKS
SOME OF MY NON-TOXIC FAVORITES
BEAUTY & NON-TOXIC PICS
Isn't it crazy that I am doing a post on non-toxic maintenance products. Hopefully there will come a time when all products will be non-toxic, but for now I rounded up my top non-toxic maintenance picks below:
DEODORANT: I'm slightly obsessed with Piperwai activated charcol deodorant. I've been using it for two years and it's the only product I have on automatic delivery and still run out of! You can find it, HERE. Just make sure you get the jar NOT the stick.
NAIL POLISH: My go-to is, Londontown! They are a "9-free" nail polish and nail care line, which claim to be free of formaldehyde, camphor, toluene, DBP (dibutyl pthalate and phthalates), formaldehyde resin, xylene, ethyl tosylamide, parabens, and lead. I'll take it! Most nail polish at the salons are "watered down" anyways so why not play it safe and bring your own for a longer lasting manicure. You can find some of my favorite colors, HERE, HERE, HERE and HERE. Nail hardener & base coat HERE. Protective top coat, HERE. Cuticle oil, HERE.
TOOTHPASTE: I've tried a bunch of fluride free toothpastes and have had trouble finding a brand that actually made my teeth feel clean. I love Natures Gate, it's the only toothpaste that did the job. You can find it, HERE. That price is for 6 tubes. I promise you will love it! The toothpaste is all natural and crafted with pure essential oils and botanical extracts, the holistic toothpaste is free of GMOs, gluten, fluoride, parabens and artificial flavors.
SCRUB: My go to body scrub is Coco Rose Body Polish, you can find it HERE. It's not only all natural but each ingredient is included for a therapeutic reason. You can't go wrong with a product made from virgin coconut oil, moroccan rose, shea butter, pink clay and sugar.
HANDSOAP: Not only am I a huge fan of pretty details, like the way Beekman wraps their bars of soap, but I'm also a huge fan of their brand and products. Their soaps and skin care products are all made using natural ingredients, without chemicals or preservatives. Most use fresh goat milk from Beekman 1802 Farm, and can be used on the most sensitive of skin. You can shop the soap, HERE.
FROWNIES FOR FIGHTING WRINKLES THE NATURAL WAY
WRINKLES & SKIN CARE
These work the old school way. I used these patches a few years ago and loved them as a good alternative to botox or anything with chemicals. Recently, I've been noticing terrible lines between my eyes, so I decided to start using them again. They work best for forehead lines though. They are very straight forward. They stop you from making the repetitive motions, like scrunching or squeezing facial muscles that cause wrinkles. The patch basically tightens up the area that it's applied to.
You should wear them when you sleep or just hanging around the house for a few hours. The consistency almost feels like construction paper. You just wet the patch and stick them over the area you want to stop from moving and they smooth the appearance of expression lines. You can use the Frownies Rose Water Spray to apply them, but water works just as well. I can't believe they have been around since 1886! They are paraban, polysorbate, disodium edta, sodium laureth, lauryl sulfate, phthalates, and fragrance free.
NOT YOUR GRANDMA'S COMPRESSION SOCKS
compression socks & pregnancy
Compression socks are always a good idea, especially if you are pregnant and suffer from any swelling. They are also great for long flights, people who are on their feet all day or sit at a desk all day, athletes, elderly...pretty much anyone.
For my pregnant mamas the benefits of compression socks can really help you through both pregnancy and the postpartum period. Check out the complete rundown for my pregnant mamas below.
BENEFITS OF COMPRESSION SOCKS
Increase circulation to your legs and feet (helps if you either stand or sit for long periods of time)
Relieve fatigued, aching legs
Prevent swelling of the feet, ankles, and legs
Improves muscle recovery after exercise
Prevent blood clots or swelling during air travel
Prevent varicose veins
When buying compression socks make sure you purchase ones that are certified graduated compression. I wore very ugly medical looking ones when I was pregnant with Charlie, but discovered Comrad compression socks with this pregnancy and I really love them. They are great for everyday use and have a compression range of 15-20 mmHg (medium compression). I linked them, HERE.
If you need something stronger I would recommend a range of 20-30 mmHg. You can find a chart which offers a rundown of the different ranges and which range you might need, HERE but I would start with the 15-20 mmHg socks.
There are also compression tights (I wore these with Charlie) and compression thigh highs along with compressions socks.
HOW YOUR LEGS CHANGE DURING PREGNANCY
"Here’s the deal your heart has with your legs: your heart will pump blood down and your leg muscles and veins will pump it back up.
However, blood volume, a growing uterus, and hormones relaxing your body so you can unhinge for birth all contribute to not-so-great circulation. Your legs often can’t handle their part of the bargain and they end up like balloons that have been filled with water and everything is pooling at the bottom. What’s worse is that it’s often exacerbated by sitting or standing for long periods of time – your legs have gravity working against them, not with them. They become swollen, tired and achy and even increase your risk for blood clots (especially when you’re flying).
So this is where compression gear comes into play.
If you took that same balloon and held it tightly in your hand, it couldn’t expand as much and it would be easier to pump any fluid back up.
Compression socks ( or compression hose; pressure stockings; support stockings or gradient stockings) keep everything (you guessed it) ‘compressed’ by being very tight at the bottom and gradually get looser as you go up (sort of like inverted Spanx). It’s like a little elevator to help your legs with their new heavy lifting of fluids to help your heart out – it’s the reason why so many athletes and runners use them." - P.C.
CHARLIE'S BIRTH STORY
BIRTH STORY & BABY
I'm having a lot of trouble writing this. I'm not sure why, because I can verbalize every moment and every single detail leading up to the birth, the day I delivered, and the hours after, but putting it in to writing is proving much more difficult. Nonetheless, here I go...
I promise you will laugh at the end, and maybe a few times throughout, which is something you might not expect when reading a birth story, but it happens to be very fitting for us as a couple and for me as an individual.
A little background: I wanted to have a natural delivery and wanted to deliver standing up. Yes, standing up. I should add...Ray thought I was nuts...but there are many reasons why, which I will touch on in a later post. I worked with a doula beforehand to get me pumped up for a successful labor without drugs. I made chicken bone broth to keep my energy up and a special drink to keep me hydrated and full of electrolytes, I decided I would labor at the hospital on a yoga ball and breath through my contractions for a natural delivery. I also wanted Ray and not the doctor to tell me the sex of the baby. We waited to find out and I thought it would be so special if my husband announced it. As you can tell, I had a real "plan" for how perfectly the birth would go. Needless to say, that is not exactly how it played out...
CHARLIE'S STORY
I knew that I was getting close. There were some physical signs that I can talk about later, but I also I had an overall feeling that the baby's arrival was close. So what would any normal person do who was about to lose all freedom? Book a day at the spa of course....and that's just what I did.
My contractions were very mild, so I decided to spend the day at the spa with a facial on the menu. That night, Ray came home from a work-dinner to find me lying alone in the dark, candles lit all around me, listening to quiet music. I told him that I thought that I was going into labor since I was experiencing contractions on and off all day. We decided to try to get some sleep and wait to go to the hospital until my contractions were closer together. I awoke at 5am to more contractions. However, since they were still not that strong, Ray decided to go to the office and keep his phone close at hand. I spent the morning on a big yoga ball and ended up going to the doctor to get checked. He told me I was 3 cm dilated and he would let me leave only if I PROMISED to come back to the hospital by 4 pm.
I called Ray at work and told him it was go time. He rushed home immediately and we spent the next 3 hours walking around Greenwich Ave. I was meandering through the streets in a pair of ratty sweatpants and a tee shirt, ready to burst, pausing occasionally during a casual contraction while "lamaze" breathing on the sidewalk. We actually stopped at CVS so Ray could get his flu shot. I remember walking around the aisles in labor going through contraction waves as he got his shot. Everyone around us was laughing, including me. However, there was a reason we did this. I felt strongly about not going to the hospital until absolutely necessary. I wanted to avoid being strapped to a bed for as long as I could...even though by this point I was fairly resigned to the fact that Greenwich Hospital probably would not let me deliver standing up.
After a few hours of walking around Greenwich while in labor, Ray finally convinced me at around 4:00 to stop by the hospital for a check-up. Despite the fact that the car was packed and ready to go , I felt much more comfortable when I was walking around, so we decided to hoof it to the hospital, which was only about a mile from our house. We thought Ray could just go back home to get the car since we figured I would be in labor for hours once I was admitted.
We walked up the Avenue to Greenwich Hospital while we were singing Eye of the Tiger the entire way, mostly because that song pumps me up. Not mostly, 100% because it pumps me up!! What a sight we must have been! Here we were, a young couple, walking up the hill on Greenwich Ave, singing Eye of the Tiger at the top of our lungs, letting nothing stand in our way...besides the occasional contraction, of course. When we arrived at the hospital, the doctor told us that I was 6 cm, so things had certainly progressed. However, we figured we still had plenty of time, after all this was our first. The doctor couldn't believe that we walked to the hospital! He immediately told Ray to jog back home, and drive back with my things.
As soon as Ray left, things escalated QUICKLY. My all natural zen experience was not so zen after all. The nurse wanted to hook me up to an IV because she thought I was dehydrated. She then made me chug apple juice, which resulted in me throwing up. The intense pain came on so suddenly and instead of breathing through my contractions, I was screaming. All I wanted to do was walk around, and all the nurse would let me do is stay in bed.
Ray was back within 30 minutes and arrived to, as he described it, a war zone. He came in smiling, carrying my yoga ball, chicken bone broth, special juice, and all the other things I thought I needed for my perfect birthing experience. However, what he came back to was not so perfect after all. I was standing up, screaming at the top of my lungs, and vomiting in to a garbage pail from the pain. Not so zen. Ray, unsure what to do, meekly offered me my yoga ball. I screamed at him like a woman possessed "Does it look like I want my yoga ball?" The doctor came in and said he thought I should get an epidural, and by this point Ray was practically begging me to take the drugs. He couldn't stand to see me in such pain...but we all know guys just can't handle it. The doctor checked me and i was 10 cm!!!! That escalated QUICKLY.
I felt the urge to push, but my doctor said I could be pushing for hours and didn't know if I would have the energy. I was so shocked that he wanted me to have an epidural, but he explained that this was my last chance. I was so vulnerable in that moment that I agreed to the epidural.
My contractions completely slowed down. There were 5 medical professionals in the room while I was screaming in labor but as soon as I got the epidural, everyone disappeared. I was so upset and felt like a failure. At this point, I felt no pain at all, which was quite a difference from just a few minutes before. Ray and I sat in silence as we waited. I was so worried that I would not know when to push because I couldn't feel anything now. Then an angel appeared. I did not like the nurse on the afternoon shift, but I had the most amazing night nurse. It is hard for me to put in to words what a difference this made on me and my entire experience. She said that we were going to do this together. She proceeded to physically turn my body in a certain way to help me feel what was going on and help prevent a tear. She also told me that we were not going to push until the very end to help prevent damage. We waited another 45 minutes and I could feel the baby coming. The nurse quickly paged the doctor. As soon as he entered the room, he said "Oh, there's the baby!" . One big giant push...and the baby came out.
Now we decided before hand that the ONE thing Ray was to do was to announce the gender of the baby. Well, after the doctor caught the baby, the baby was presented to Ray for the big reveal. "IT'S A GIRL!" Ray declared with such confidence and pride. OMG I thought. A girl?! This entire pregnancy, I was just so sure that we were having a boy. "Try again buddy," the doctor said. The other nurses were holding back laughter. Ray was just a little shell shocked by the whole birthing experience and at this moment was clearly overwhelmed. Consumed with emotion, he basically just guessed the gender! Our baby BOY was then placed on my chest and my birthing experience didn't matter one bit. Absolutely everything was perfect! I was blessed with a healthy baby boy.
The night ended with the nurse taking me to the bathroom to pee after I finally got some feeling back in my legs. As she stood there holding on to my arms, I whispered to her, "Did I poop during delivery?" She shook her head, "No, hun you did great :) "
EASTER BASKET STUFFERS
EASTER TRADITIONS & BABIES
EASTER TRADITIONS
I've always loved Easter morning. There are so many reasons, but one that really stands out is our family tradition of the Easter basket hunt. Every Easter morning I would wake up ready to run around the house in search of my filled Easter basket. I was the youngest of four, so the chances someone might find my basket first was high. The "Easter bunny" was also very creative with the hiding spots, nothing was off limits. The dryer, washer, refrigerator, inside the grandfather clock....pretty much anywhere. We are going to carry on this tradition with Charlie this year, with his colorful basket from Infantino (not pictured below). I believe you need to start these family traditions very early so they stick. I mean here I am YEARS later still reminiscing about our tradition.
CHARLIE'S BASKET
EASTER BASKET WITH WHEELS: I LOVE this basket I bought in Connecticut at Pink Lemon Blue Lime. It's an Olli Ella basket and I have a feeling we will have it for years. There are wheels on the bottom and Charlie loves running around the house with it. You can find it HERE.
EASTER EGG: Even though Charlie is young, Easter is not complete without a little bit of candy. I got this special egg filled with mini eggs at Le Pain Quotidien. You can find it HERE.
MONOGRAMMED BUNNY & BOOK: I'm a huge fan of Jelly Cat. Their stuffed animals are so soft and Jelly Cat has books that go with each animal. You can find the Jelly Cat bunny, HERE & the, If I were a Rabbit book, HERE. We had Monogrammary monogram the bunnies ear with a heart and Charlie's name. Now that I know Jelly Cat stuffed animals can be monogrammed, this will be a go-to baby gift for me. If you have a baby 0-4 months this Jelly Cat bunny is perfect, HERE.
BASKET LINER: I was worried about finding a liner that fit on such an odd shaped basket. I was pleasantly surprised that this one fit perfectly. You can find it, HERE.
Charlie's entire outfit is from Janie & Jack. He wore the exact same thing last Easter....just in a much smaller size.
We have a few weekends filled with Easter events so I also got him a matching outfit for him and his brother (not here yet) You can shop this outfit below. Oh and check out his bunny ears.
STUFFERS
Though Peeps, Cadbury eggs and chocolate bunnies were always a favorite, check out some toy focused ideas below. I also included some pretty Easter candy and some adorable outfits for your LO.
NAP TIME TRANSITION, GOING FROM TWo naps TO ONE + Q&A WITH A SLEEP SPECIALIST
TODDLERS & SLEEP
Charlie is showing signs he is ready to transition to one nap. He hardly ever takes his afternoon nap, he just talks and plays in his crib then he begins to cry for a while before I get him. His afternoon nap is only happening about 30 percent of the time.
His usual schedule is:
WAKE UP: 7 am
FIRST NAP: 9/9:30
SECOND NAP: 2:30
NIGHT TIME SLEEP: 7 pm
I had no idea how to start the, "one nap per day transition" but I was lucky enough to meet sleep specialist, Hillary Catherine at the perfect time! Starting the transition anywhere between 12-19 months is normal, but 14 to 15 months is most common. Charlie is 17 months old, and with a brother on the way I figured we better start now.
We had a call where I went over Charlie's sleep history, his current schedule, and what the issues were. She developed a very straight forward 6 step plan and sent it over to me the next day! Please see below
TRANSITION SCHEDULE
Hillary recommended we slowly move Charlie's nap later by 30 minutes every three days until he was going to sleep at noon. This put us on a 10 day nap transition plan. I was worried Charlie would get very sleepy in the mornings while we were implementing the plan. Hillary said this might happen, but suggested taking him outside or giving him a snack to perk him up. Taking him outside, even when it was chilly, definitely helped! She also let us know that it can take up to a month to fully adjust to one nap and a 1:00 pm naptime is the ultimate goal around 2 years of age.
Q&A WITH HILLARY CATHERINE
Q: When should I transfer my toddler from his crib to a big kid bed?
A: Hold off as long as you can! Keeping your child in their crib will help them sleep
better and longer through the night. With a big kid bed comes big responsibilities. These
responsibilities can be difficult for a child under three to understand, which often leads
to greater difficulty falling asleep, night wakings, and middle of the night trips into your
room. The crib has been your child’s safe space, and the physical boundaries of a crib
create a sense of security. The only reason to switch to a big kid bed younger than
three would be for safety. If your toddler has started climbing out of their crib, despite all of your efforts to keep them from being able to do so, it is time to make the switch.
Safety is, of course, number one. Expect some challenges during this transition. The
best thing you can do to make the transition on your child easier is to be consistent with
your expectations and rules, especially in the early stages of transitioning.
Q: What about early risings? My toddler is always up so early!
A: There might be a fix for this, but it depends. If by early you mean 6:00am I have
some sad news for you. You might just have a child who is an early riser. As a parent of
an early riser I can sympathize with you, but it is just who they are! My best tips for you
are to make sure you hold to an early bedtime so that they get the sleep they need, you
buy a programmable coffee maker, and find a way to embrace the early morning.
However, if your child is up before 6:00am and is over 18 months old I would strongly
recommend investing in a toddler clock like the Ok to Wake Clock (HERE) or the Hatch Baby Rest Night Light (HERE). These clocks work better for older toddler who can understand the concept. These clocks will change colors at the wake up time you set, letting your little one know that it is ok to get out of bed. It might take a few days to teach them how it works. If your child comes to you before it is time to wake up you can gently return them to their room, explain the clock to them again, using simple terms like, “When the clock turns green that means it is time to wake up. It is not green yet, so it is still night-night time. Go back to sleep.” Keep in mind that toddlers see the world in black and white so it is important that you are extremely consistent when you introduce the new clock so they can learn and understand how it works.
Q: Some nights it feels like bedtime goes on forever. My kids end up getting so wound up that they won’t go to sleep and by the time they are in bed I am
exhausted.
A: We all want extra cuddles and smiles in the evening and peaceful bedtimes. We are
tired and we know our children are tired, so when bedtime gets out of hand it can be so
frustrating for everybody. The good news is that bedtime can be that good every night.
Many parents I have worked with say it is one of their favorite times of the day. I know it
is one of my favorite times. The key is having a routine and sticking to it. I recommend that a bedtime routine is 20-30 minutes total in length. The trick is making it exactly the
same every single night. Often the struggle comes down to the “one more story” line we
all know so well. My advice is to pick how many stories the bedtime routine will include
and then never read more. Although the routine sounds rigid and inflexible, what you
are doing is teaching your child what to expect. Toddlers thrive on routines -- and who
can blame them? If your child is struggling to stick to the routine you can make a
bedtime routine chart with images to help them understand.
If you have specific sleep concerns that are not addressed in this post reach out to Hillary, sleep@hillarycatherine.com, www.hillarycatherine.com to set up an appointment. I really enjoyed working with her around toddler sleep. She specializes in sleep at every age.
NEWTON BABY CRIB MATTRESS
Product Pick of the Week, Newton Mattress
Do you remember the video I posted on Friday night of Charlie "dancing?" He thinking he is dancing but he is actually just spinning. Our Friday night dance party wrapped up at 6 pm. Fast forward to 7 pm, when we heard screams coming from his nursery only to find Charlie projectile vomiting all over his crib!! We are taking a break from music at the Nipple household for a while.
Dealing with a poor baby vomiting is not only sad, but it's so much work juggling the mess and the babe. That's why I'm highlighting The Newton Baby Crib Mattress as my product spotlight of the week. When your child gets sick all you have to do is simply unzip the mattress cover and throw it in the wash. The actual mattress, the Wovenaire® core is made of 90% free air - yes, air and 10% safe food-grade polymer. You can throw the mattress right in the shower or bath and just wipe it down.
One of the main reasons I bought the mattress for Charlie is that it is breathable. The Newton Baby Crib mattress has an innovative design which allows air to flow freely for optimal breathability and temperature regulation. 100 Percent breathable, washable, recyclable and free of toxins!!! The material is very cool! It's also Greenguard Gold certified, which means no off-gassing, toxic chemicals or allergens. The mattress has two stages so will last through the toddler years.
You do not need sheets if you buy the Newton Mattress. If you do decide to throw a fitted sheet over the mattress, make sure the sheet is made out of a breathable material. A muslin sheet is a wonderful option since muslin is a finely woven breathable fabric. I love the Aden and Anais muslin sheets because they are not only breathable but come in a variety of very fun prints.
You can find the mattress, HERE
PREPARING BABY NUMBER ONE FOR BABY NUMBER TWO
BABY & NEW SIBLING
No matter the age of your first or second or third, one thing that I'm sure doesn't change with each child is wondering and worrying about how they will be effected with a new addition.
My son, Charlie, is only 16 months old and will be a big brother in 6 short weeks. Though it's been hard preparing such a young little person for another baby, there are some things we have been doing as a family that have been helpful.
WATCH & REPEAT
Anything Daddy does with Mommy, Charlie wants do it. Whether it's hold my hand, dance with me, kiss me, Charlie wants to get right in there. We found it very difficult to teach Charlie why my belly was growing or even have him acknowledge the sudden growth. As soon as my husband started paying attention (kissing, rubbing, talking to the baby) to my belly in front of Charlie, Charlie has changed his attitude completely. All he wants to do is love on my growing bump. He now not only acknowledges it but he hugs and kisses his baby brother in utero, as well. This gave us the opportunity to start talking about the new baby and pointing to my bump.
ACTIVITES
We ordered this Manhattan Toys baby soft doll which has been so useful for teaching Charlie about the new baby. She comes with a pacifier and says MAMA. You can find the girl version, HERE and the boy version, HERE.
We pretty much have been doing everything with the soft toy doll.
We practice :
-Changing her
-Swaddling her
-Reading to her
-Putting her down for naps in her bassinet
-Carrying her in the baby wrap
I just started doing a little at a time, but will probably start incorporating more activities with his “baby” into our routine now that the new baby is almost here. Charlie is way more into it than I thought he would be. We will probably change his stroller into a double soon and take out the infant seat as well, just so he gets used to his old equipment coming out and being eventually used by our new addition.
PRODUCTS
Here are some products I recommend to help with the transition:
The Manhattan Toy Soft Dolls: I love this product; it's been such a great tool for getting Charlie ready for the new baby.
The New Baby work book: This book is a little old for Charlie but a great book for a family with kids of all varying ages. There are so many useful activities to talk about, everything from what’s going on in your tummy to what things you will need with the new baby. I highly recommend this product.
Books: Charlie, like most toddlers, loves books and reading time. I would recommend books about a new baby addition to the family. However, don’t force it too much, but if your child seems interested, try and get a book in there once a day or a few times a week. We let Charlie choose what he wants to read, but instead of letting him pick from all of his books, I will let him choose from five and throw two baby books in there. It then becomes his choice to read about the event that will forever enrich our growing family.
DOULA Q&A
MOM LIFE & COFFEE WITH A DOULA
Meet Margot!
My name is Margot Lowenstein Simmons and I was born to mother. I work to redefine the scope of doula. I am a trained postpartum doula, a certified breastfeeding counselor and a Sleep Savvy Gentle Sleep Coach. I bring my own personal humor and joy for family to my work. I provide truly nonjudgemental support and specialize in offering practical tips and tricks, coaching to ensure a happy, relaxed family unit, transitioning to and from work, as well as the special experience of having toddlers! Because - I think we could all use a little less judgement and little more doula.
Margot answered a few of YOUR questions.
I have a 16 month old and I'm due with my second next week. Any and all advice with routines for two babies would be great!
Congratulations!! Having been a mom to 2 under 2, myself, I totally can say that while hard, this is also an amazing dynamic!
The best advice I have on the managing of two babies - and really multiple children of any kind - is just to take stock and realize that sometimes it’s gonna work and sometimes it’s gonna fail. And when it works - it works brilliantly. And when it fails, it fails hard. Having realistic expectations and taking “failures” in stride and with perspective is imperative.
Related to perspective, remember to find the time out for yourself. When you’re managing two babies, it’s easy to get lost in the ups and downs of the crazy. Taking moments away - real moments - from the start - where you can learn to rely on someone else to manage the logistics is invaluable. Not only will it allow you to feel sane - investing in teaching someone else “the way” will allow you to step away with much more ease when it’s getting to be too much.
Finally, remember that there are moments when both kids will be synced up and moments when it’ll feel like they couldn’t be more out of tune with their needs. In the very beginning, it’s easier. Throwing new baby in the carrier and tending to toddler with two hands can be the norm - for bath time, for dinner, for naps on the go. As baby gets older and demands more of a schedule - look for efficiencies. Can baby be bathed at the same time as toddler? Can you give baby a bottle or a boob while toddler eats dinner? Finding the synergies within your routines is clutch. Then, one day, you’ll look up and realize both kids are napping at the same time - and you’ll say to yourself - “holy $#*! - I have 30 mins to myself! What should I do?!”
Any advice on deciding for a RCS or VBAC? Any advice on how to have a successful VBAC?
Do your research and make your own choices within the context of your circumstances. Decide what feels right to you and advocate for it before and during your delivery. Remember…this is YOUR experience. It is unique to you and to this baby. It’s routine for your doctor. So, speak up. Even in an “emergency,” you can always ask for a couple of minutes to process and assess your feelings. Making your own choices is incredibly powerful.
Don’t wait to speak up until you’re in the moment. Talk to your practitioner in the many weeks leading up to your delivery. Ask how many of his or her patients have successful VBAC attempts. Talk about what he or she sees as the likelihood of your being successful. Make him or her hear your wishes but also understand your practitioner’s POV. You need to go in eyes wide open to what your practitioner thinks and feels so there aren’t surprises about decisions that get made. If you don’t like what you’re hearing – consider a change. There are lots of women who late-term transfer and plenty of practitioners who accept them.
Get support. If you really want the VBAC, consider whether you will feel strong enough – whether your partner will feel strong enough – to speak up in the face of nurses and doctors who may be saying scary things. If you even think you might feel intimidated – get the support of a doula or someone who can be your advocate – who has see successful VBACs – who has experience and who is in tune with your emotional and physical well-being.
Most of all – go with your gut. It’s the surest way to no regrets. And regardless of how you deliver your baby – remember that it will be special for you and for that baby forever.
Any tips on getting back to work life balance would be awesome. We had a great balance pre baby but we obviously have way more responsibility now.
Work/life balance is a funny thing – sort of a holy grail! First, own that it’s not going to look like it was before. Mourn the loss – it’s okay! Sometimes we beat ourselves up for feeling sad that we yearn for our pre-baby lives – but it’s normal. We just don’t talk about it. So, go ahead and say it out loud. Having a baby isn’t all fun – it’s amazing – but it’s hard!
Then, consider what were the most “good-feeling” parts of that balance before baby. Was it that you never had to race out before your work was done to get home to relieve a nanny or pick up a baby from day care? Was it that you didn’t have to choose between the gym and work and seeing your baby? Isolate the biggest points of frustration – then you can go about resolving the biggest pain points.
Make a plan. Don’t look at singular days – look at weeks – and chunk them out on your Google or Outlook calendar. Don’t exist in the tyranny of the urgent; you’ll never feel like you have balance. Block off your “work” time, your family bonding time, your YOU time (don’t forget this one!!), your friend time, etc. Consider each category important and treat it like you’d treat meetings with your boss. If you have to move a family thing because something at work came up – you don’t LOSE that family thing – you move it somewhere else.
And, partner with your partner. Talk things out and make sure you are clear on what each of you is responsible for. Maybe one night per week is your “stay however late I need to” night and your partner is on baby duty. Maybe he is the baby supply Amazon order captain and you’re the fridge is stocked boss lady. Sharing the “wealth” is important so resentments don’t build up. I’m a HUGE advocate of talking this out before your baby even arrives. Ask me more about that!
SLEEP. My baby is 3 months old. Great naps, falls asleep on his own for naps but not bed time. Sleeps thru the night but getting him down at night is a struggle. Any advice?
First of all – your three month old sleeps through the night!!! Pat on the back, mama! This is the exception – not the rule! So celebrate small victories. Sometimes it seems like everyone else has sleep “easy” but I assure you the dirty little secret is that EVERYONE tackles a sleep challenge.
The struggle you’re experiencing could be caused by a range of things. But, for anyone struggling with some issue with their nighttime sleep routine, my biggest suggestion is to go back to basics.
Examine how much sleep your baby is getting in 24 hours. Are they getting too little or too much? There is a range!
Make sure your babe isn’t getting over-stimulated before bedtime. I’m a HUGE advocate of circadian rhythms. Make sure your baby gets exposed to daylight during the day and darkness at night. In the hours between dusk and bedtime, take your baby outside and let them experience the sun setting and darkness arriving (even for 10 minutes). When you come back in – turn your screens off and your lights low.
Consider a really good “getting ready for bed” routine and keep it consistent every night. Maybe a walk, a bottle or nurse, a bath, a song or book and then into bed. Keep it consistent.
MRS. NIPPLE'S REGISTRY CHECK LIST
MRS. NIPPLE'S REGISTRY CHECK LIST 0-3 MONTHS
SLEEP
Bassinet
Blackout Shades
Baby Monitor
Humidifier
White Noise Machine
Crib Mattress
Crib Sheets X2
LOUNGING AND SOOTHING
Glider or Rocker
Rock n’ Play
Bouncer
Lounger
FORMULA FEEDING
Bottles
Bottle Drying Rack
Bottle Warmer
Chemical Free Bottle Cleaner Soap
Bibs & Burp Cloths
BREASTFEEDING
Nursing friendly tanks
Nursing friendly Bras
Nursing Cover
Nursing Pillow
Nursing Pillow Cover
Nursing Pads
Nipple Cream
Bibs & Burp Cloths
Electric Pump
Breast Milk Storage bags
Bottles
Bottle Drying Rack
Bottle Warmer
Bottle Cleaner
BABY GEAR & ON THE GO
Stroller
Lightweight Stroller
Infant Car Seat
Car Seat Adapters (if needed)
Car Window Shade
Baby Carrier
Baby Wrap
FIRST AID AND HEALTH
Infant Tylenol
Smoke and Carbon Monoxide Detector
Nasal Bulb Syringe
Thermometer & Rectal Thermometer
Baby Nail Clipper
DIAPERING
Changing Pad
Diaper Pail
Diaper Bag
Travel Changing Pad
Wipes
Newborn Diapers
Diaper Cream
Wipe Dispenser
BATH TIME
Infant Bath Tub
Hooded Towel X3
Washcloths X5
Chemical free Shampoo and Body Wash
CLOTHING
Long sleeved onesies sidesnap tees X5
Long-sleeved Onesies X5
Short-sleeved Onesies- seasonal X5
Newborn Caps X3
Pants X5
Socks X5
Swaddle X2
Pajamas X5
Hamper
Gentle chemical free detergent
MRS. NIPPLE'S REGISTRY CHECK LIST 4-12 MONTHS
GEAR
Portable Play Yard
Play Yard Sheet
Convertible Car Seat
Activity Center Jumper
Baby Play Gym
Foam Play Mat
Toy
Board Books
BATH
Kneeling Mat
Bath Toys
Baby Bath Tub
FOOD
High Chair
Food Processor
Baby Food Storage Containers
Utensils
Sippy Cup
Bae The Label Maternity Clothing Review
PREGNANCY & MATERNITY CLOTHING
I received many beautiful pieces from Bae The Label a few weeks ago and I am hooked! Not only is their clothing comfortable and trendy, they are all pieces I will wear after pregnancy. I was also very impressed with the quality of the material.
Bae The Label is an Australian based company. At first, I was worried about the hassle of possibly returning items with future purchases, but I cannot ever see myself making any returns with this brand.
These leggings are adorable! I love the drop crotch and if you are sick of wearing tight leggings and skinny jeans, these are your guys. They are extremely slimming and I'm also slightly obsessed with the print/color.
The sweatshirt is also very high quality. I love that I can wear it during the bump, for breastfeeding, and down the road. It's also the perfect shade of pink.
Everything is linked below.
You can find the sweatshirt, HERE it also comes in gray, HERE and there is a version with a hood HERE
You can find the leggings, HERE they are also available in navy, HERE
Other pieces they sent that I love,
This dress which comes in three colors, click HERE (love the cross hem in front) with this shirt tied right below breast over dress, click HERE
This jumpsuit which is so comfortable and slimming, click
This denim top, HERE
SHOPBOP SALE
Shopbop & Sale
non-maternity picks
maternity picks
TRAVELING WITH A BABY
MRS. NIPPLE TIPS & TRAVEL
When Charlie was five months old, I brought him to Ireland for 11 days. It was so great having him on such a memorable trip and if I could do it again, I would still bring him. With the right tools and plan, traveling with your baby is not as scary as it might initially sound. I would like to note that we had not started solids with Charlie and he was not crawling at this point.
THINGS I THOUGHT ABOUT WHEN PLANNING OUR TRIP
-What is the time difference?
-How much driving will we be doing each day & what is the max amount our baby can handle?
-How long are the flights & what time would be the best time to travel?
-What is the least amount of equipment the baby will need?
-What will we have access to when we arrive so we don't have to travel with a ton of baby equipment?
-Where will he nap? (without naps our baby turns into a monster)
-How long will it take to get a passport for our baby? (babies do not need identification for domestic travel)
Planning ahead of time
1) If you are traveling internationally, your baby will need a passport. More on that HERE.
2) Call your destination ahead of time to see what baby equipment is available. Charlie has been on 10 flights and I've never traveled with a pack n' play. I always call the hotel or ask the Airbnb ahead of time and most places have them. There was only one time there was not one available, so I was able to rent one from a local baby rental company. He has also just slept next to me in bed in the Dockatot (before he started rolling).
3) Do some research around what pharmacies and grocery stores are accessible. You can stock up on diapers and wipes once you arrive.
4) Make sure your car rental has a seat belt locking system so you can utilize the European Belt Path option (if your car seat has this feature) so you can travel without the cumbersome car seat base. Every car in the US that was manufactured after 1996 has the locking system. Watch a video around the European Belt Path option HERE.
5) Check the guidelines for your airline to determine how many items you can check for you baby. Click HERE for guidelines around brining formula/milk through security. I checked both Charlie's car seat and Dockatot free of charge. If you don't want to spend money on the specific travel bags for your baby gear then these are great travel bags. Click HERE.
Time Change
We traveled to Ireland which is 5 hours ahead. Charlie was a champ adjusting to the new time zone.
Here are a few tips that eased his transition:
1) Get as much outdoor time as possible. Just like adults, your child's clock will reset naturally. This will take place much faster if you get your baby out in the natural sunlight during the day so they get the signal that they should be awake.
2) Don't plan too much on the first day you arrive so you can really work around how your baby is feeling.
3) Don't mess too much with your baby’s routine. Still try to get those naps in because it will be even harder getting an overtired baby to sleep at night. If you have a bath, story time, favorite blanket routine, stick with it. My favorite two products for naps on the go are HERE and HERE. The Cozi-GO was a pure lifesaver when traveling. It's not realistic to sit in your hotel room while your baby naps. The Cozi-Go makes it possible to have the best of both worlds. Your baby can have a wonderful nap on the go while you can still enjoy your vacation. If your baby falls asleep during the day thinking it's really time to go to sleep for the night, wake them up after their usual nap length.
4) You can start shifting your baby’s bed time a few days before you leave by 10-15 minutes each night.
THE WEEK BEFORE YOU TRAVEL
I know there are always a million things to do the week before you travel, but make sure you don't disrupt your baby’s schedule, especially the few days right before your trip. The last thing you want to do is start your trip off with a cranky baby. Either order everything you need online or pay the extra $$ to get a babysitter so you can run the errands you need to run.
TICKETS, THE AIRPORT, & THE FLIGHT
BOOKING:
If the flight is only a few hours long, I recommend booking the flight around nap times so your baby can nap in the air. If the fight is over six hours, I would recommend booking an overnight flight if there is that option. Since our trip to Ireland was a 7 hour flight, I booked an overnight flight.
Call the airlines ahead of time to check if there are any bassinets available. Aer Lingus had two bassinets available for the entire flight and I was able to book one for Charlie, free of charge. It made such a big difference. He slept the entire flight right in the bassinet, swaddled, with his noise maker on. If the airline does not have bassinets, I would recommend going right to the flight attendant when you arrive at the gate to see if there are any extra seats on the flight so your child can be comfortable and sleep. Of course, a child travels un-ticketed until the age of two unless you would like to purchase a seat for them.
AT THE AIRPORT:
Our international flight was around 10 PM. I found an American Express lounge and made sure to get Charlie to sleep at his normal 7:00 bed time in a private room at the lounge. I got to the airport early just to put him to bed on time. I was able to transfer him to his stroller (THANK YOU COZI-GO) and only woke him up to breastfeed him during take off (more on that later) and then transferred him into his bassinet. The only time he cried was when we were waiting to take off because I was holding off on feeding him until we were on the runway, almost in the air. It wasn't perfect and he woke up a few times in the lounge before we boarded, but getting him some sleep at his normal sleep time was very helpful. He ended up sleeping like an angel the entire flight!
DOMESTIC TRAVEL:
For our domestic flights, I had him in a Solly Baby Wrap until take off when I took him out to breastfeed him. After his take off feeding, he would fall fast asleep. I then would wake him up to feed him during landing. Again, the only time he cried was when we were taxing because I was waiting to breastfeed him until we were actually taking off. It's important your baby is sucking in some way during take off and landing to help with the pressure changes.
PRODUCTS for the flight
The only things I brought on the flights were:
The YOYO stroller (I had to explain to the flight attendants it DOES in fact fit in the overhead compartment. I would not let them gate check it even though they wanted to most of the time.)
All of our baby’s diapering needs including an extra change of clothes, a pacifier, a few toys, a blanket, his dockatot and swaddle (overnight travel).
This toy mat/bag perfect for the airport HERE
Bottles: I was breastfeeding and Charlie didn't start eating solids until after 6 months, so I had my boobs with me :)
If you book a seat for your baby, you can put the Dockatot right down on the seat or place it on your lap.
The Cozi-GO in-flight bassinet cover & stroller cover. This is pretty much the most amazing travel product we own. You can find it HERE.
PRODUCTS I INVESTED IN for the trip
TRAVEL SPECIFIC REVIEW:
THE COZI-GO: One of my favorite travel products and worth every penny. This product made it possible for Charlie to nap uninterrupted on the go. It blocks out 97% of light and is 100 percent breathable. It also has a universal fit for any stroller. We used it in flight over the airplane bassinet as well. It also offers UV protection and is perfect for beach time.
BABYZEN YOYO: Folds down to the size of a bag, lightweight, and you can throw it over your shoulder. It also fits in the overhead compartment on airplanes and can even roll down the center aisles on some planes. It's small enough that it won't take up a ton of space in compact cars when traveling in other countries. Plus you can easily throw it over your shoulder and have both hands free when climbing stairs. This is the perfect travel stroller. I would never even entertain the idea of traveling on a road trip or aircraft with our big stroller. The YOYO even has a bassinet option for newborns or you can just buy the car seat adapters and have your carseat fit right on top of the stroller. You can find the product HERE
Nuna Pippa: This car seat makes travel so easy. There is no need to bring that heavy base along for your trip. This car seat uses the European Belt Path which is just a fancy term for, “you can use the seat belt in your car to secure the car seat and it's just as safe as using the car seat with your base.” We put our car seat in a travel bag and check it as soon as we get to the airport. You can find the product HERE
BabyBanZ: Perfect for those crucial naps on the go and attending loud events. They also stay on! You can find the product HERE
Dockatot: This was such a lifesaver when traveling. We never had to worry about sleeping arrangements for Charlie. The Dockatot made it possible to sleep in a hotel room in bed right next to mommy, in any pack n' play (if the hotel or airbnb had one available), or even on a sofa. Our baby used the Dockatot from day one, so anywhere we travel he still feels like he's sleeping at home. There is also a travel bag for the Dockatot which makes traveling easy. I would also store any of his toys and blankets in the Dockatot bag so all of his sleep products were in one place. You can find the Dockatot HERE and the carrier HERE
Gathre Mats: I use this changing mat when we travel because it is so thin. I can roll it up or fold it and fit it pretty much anywhere. It's also very durable. You can find the product HERE
Baby Carrier: Any baby carrier will work. They can be a little bit bulky but are wonderful for a trip filled with a good amount of walking and naps on the go. I use a carrier vs. a wrap when I'm going to be on my feet all day and need the extra back support. You can find a good traveling carrier HERE or HERE
Baby wraps: Wraps are wonderful options and are much easier to pack. You can\ find the one I used HERE
Marpac Dohm Hushh Portable Sound Machine: Crucial for preventing over stimulation during nap times while traveling. This noise maker is small, rechargeable and holds the charge very well. You can find the product HERE
3 Sprouts Hedgehog Play Mat Bag: Not only can you use this mat any time & anywhere but it also folds up into a convenient bag making it great for travel. You can keep you child's toys in the bag then open the bag into a play mat with all the toys conveniently right on the mat. You can find the product HERE
FOR FULL REVIEWS OF THE ABOVE PRODUCTS CLICK HERE
InstaNT pot & The Great Debate
The Instant Pot & The Great Debate
YOU CAN BUY THE INSTANT POT, HERE
I posted a survey on instagram last week around getting an Instant Pot. I had many people contact me to share the results. You can find all of the comments I received below.
81 % GO FOR IT
- "Best kitchen gadget ever!"
-"Yess"
-"Yes!! It's amazing, awesome for quick dinners and people (like me 😂) who forget to meal prep or take things out of the freezer to defrost. Makes your meals taste like they've been cooking slow and low all day, you can even do a whole roast in this bad boy! Even homemade yogurt, like, what?! But wait, there's more! Broths, soups, curries, shredded chicken for tacos enchiladas BBQ sandwiches...okay I'm done now...go buy one! I have a crockpot and never use it"
- "Have one and it’s pretty awesome but, the novelty wore off and now it’s just in the pantry 😆"
-"Yesssss it’s my absolute fave kitchen appliance"
-"It’s amazing!"
- "Ohh my god. I can't even with this thing. It changes lives."
- "I can't say enough good things!!!!!!"
-"Yes they’re amazinggggggg"
-"very easy to use and very easy clean up"
-"I like that on my crazy days it's a bucket of my life I don't have to think about. Just pop the stuff in and let it go"
19 % WASTE OF MONEY
-"I have one and seem to be he only one that is "meh". Full disclosure I need to research more but right now it's almost like a glorified slow cooker. Meaning, it's the same recipes as I would in a slow cooker because you need liquid .. but just a little less time. But you still need to cook things for an hour sometimes so I don't really think it has changed my routine that much? Don't know if that makes sense"
- "Have one and it’s pretty awesome but, the novelty wore off and now it’s just in the pantry 😆"
Non- Toxic Skin Care & Clean Beauty
Skin care & Pregnancy
If you saw my makeup post then you know I'm all about all natural skincare. I always check for parabens and phthalates among other things. Though this started during my first pregnancy, it's now something I stick to, pregnant or not. My go-to skincare one stop shop is, Follain. It's the equivalent to Sephora minus all of the chemicals. Follain is somewhere you can shop with 100% confidence that you are getting products that will help, not hurt you. I suffer from slight redness and the occasional breakout but other than those two issues, I have normal skin. Check out my skincare routine below.
MAKE UP REMOVER
I've tried so many makeup removers but they all seem to strip my skin. I stopped using wipes and now only use cleansing oil. You can find it HERE
CLEANSERS
I use different cleansers each day depending on how my skin is acting. I have four I alternate among.
1) To get a squeaky clean feel, I use this awesome charcoal bar; you can find it HERE . If you workout everyday this is a great post workout cleanser and this is for YOU!
2) When my skin is acting sensitive, this is my cleanser. This cleanser is gentle enough for babies. Its ingredients include natural grain-based witch hazel combined with healing lavender and geranium to deliver squeaky clean skin without stripping or irritation. You can find it HERE. If you have sensitive skin, this cleanser is for YOU!
3) There are days where that "pregnancy glow" is a distant memory, when your skin is so dull that you need an instant pick me up. You need a brightening cleanser. If that's you, then you can find it HERE . If you have dull skin then this is for YOU!
4) This Osea mud cleanser does wonders for oily or acne prone skin. This potion includes organic algae masquerading as mud and delivers immediate relief. The result is clean, tingling skin, ready to work its way back to balance. If oil or acne is your problem you can find it, HERE If you have acne prone or oily skin then this is for YOU!
REDDNESS
If you suffer from redness or skin that gets irritated easily this Organic soothing Gel soothes & calms skin. It works wonders. You can find it, HERE
TONER
Out of all the products, the Hannes Dottir Mineral Mist is a favorite. All I know is when I spray this baby on, I'm left with smooth and glowing skin. I was never a person that used toners until I found this product. It is a MUST have. You can find it HERE.
FACE SERUM
I love this serum. Its very versatile and works for any skin type. While it reduces lines and redness, it's even gentle enough for fine lines in the sensitive undereye area. The nutrients in this product leave your skin radiating. You can find it HERE
UNDER EYE SERUM
If you choose to use an under eye specific repair serum I like La Bella Figura. It's a little $$$ but check it out. You can find it, HERE.
MOISTURIZER
I like a very lightweight moisturizer. When I'm breaking out, I use Osea Blemish Balm Moisturizer. You can find it HERE
For all other days, I use the Osea Atmosphere Protection cream which is also lightweight. It shields skin from youth-robbing free radicals. You can find it HERE
OR
The indie Lee facial cream. You can find it HERE
PREPARING FOR BIRTH, BABY, AND BEYOND
PREGNANCY & PREPERATION
Mrs. Nipple: So I met a friend on the internet :) That sounds as funny as I thought it would, but she's pretty awesome. Her name is Meg Hall and she has a great blog called, For The Long Hall. When I read her mom's post about preparing for birth & labor, I just knew it was too good not to share. Meg's mom has quite the track record. Family Nurse Practitioner, Certified Nurse Midwife, and most recently, a Doctor of Nursing Practice and Certified Nurse Educator.
Meg Hall: Arguably the greatest benefit I've had at my disposal throughout my pregnancy is my mom! While she's a rockstar mama in general, she also happens to be an extremely talented women's health provider (and now professor). My mom has a passion for learning and caring for women and has worked for many years as a Family Nurse Practitioner, Certified Nurse Midwife, and most recently, a Doctor of Nursing Practice and Certified Nurse Educator. She's not only a super smart cookie, but also a very level-headed, non-judgmental and rational healthcare provider that immediately puts her patients at ease (you can ask my friends - who have been asking her 'embarrassing' questions my entire life ;)
Disclaimer: any and all advice below should not replace or override the recommendations of your healthcare provider. Please ask your doctor for recommendations specific to you or your pregnancy.
Brenda M Gilmore DNP, CNM, FNP, CNE (Meg's mom) will take over for the remainder of the blog post
Introduction
First, we’ll start with preparation for birth including the choice of the birth attendant and then we will talk about some common practices during labor and birth. We end with some thoughts about going home with the new baby. I am not including my resources for this post. However, I did consult the literature while writing this and I am including links with supportive information as I go along.
Preparing for Labor and Birth
Remember, women have been having babies for centuries. Our bodies are made for this amazing job. Have confidence that your body will know what to do when the time comes to give birth. We are extremely fortunate to have so many ways to support you in the birth process. Embrace this new journey you are about to take. Be thoughtful and informed about the birth process and the multitude of options you have in this country. Do some research and consider your expectations and beliefs surrounding labor and birth. This will facilitate your choice of a provider and your decisions regarding pregnancy, labor and birth. Be an active participant in your pregnancy and birth experience.
Choosing a Provider
When choosing a provider first you have to consider where you would like to have your baby. Are you planning a home birth? If so a licensed midwife may be the choice for you. Licensed midwives or direct-entry midwives who are non-nurses and they are trained to do home birth. Be aware that they are not available in all states. https://mana.org
If you are still looking for a more holistic midwifery approach but not necessarily a home birth then certified nurse midwives (CNMs) may be the answer. Certified nurse midwives are advanced practice nurses who can attend birth at home, in birth centers, or in the hospital setting. Overall, CNMs have a close relationship with the medical community for collaboration. They can also provide women’s health across the lifespan and not only during pregnancy. http://www.midwife.org
If you have medical conditions or other circumstances that may put you at higher risk then you may be more comfortable with a physician overseeing your care. Or some women just prefer care by a physician. There are many options for board certified OB/GYN physicians throughout the country. https://www.acog.org/Patients
Today, many OB/GYN practices have both physicians and CNMs who work together collaboratively so you can have the best of both worlds. Regardless of your choice you should verify your provider’s credentials and reputation.
Labor and Birth Expectations
What do you know about labor and birth? Have you done this before? Is this your first baby? Have you read up on the process? Have you taken any childbirth classes? Do you know what your options are regarding care? Who’s going to be with you? Have you discussed this with your provider? Have you thought about a birth plan? I know I’m asking more questions than providing answers but really knowing about the birth process and considering what you expect and want will lessen the fear of the unknown and help you prepare in a thoughtful way and reduce your anxiety while awaiting the birth of your baby.
Birth Plans
A birth plan is not a contract or a concrete expectation of what should happen during labor and birth. It is a thoughtful list of choices surrounding birth and labor that you would prefer. There should always be room for contingency plans in case emergencies arise and care for you and the has to be changed. By working through a birth plan it assist you in considering aspects of labor and birth that you may not have thought of before you became more educated and inform on this subject. The birth plan can also prompt conversation with your provider as specific questions arise. Here is a very comprehensive birth plan template.
Labor Support
Labor and Birth Coaches
So this is a big question for “the big day.” Who do you want to support you during labor?” Please notice did I did not say, “Who do you want in the room with you?” A birth is not a “show or circus” to watch. Labor and birth are hard work and you need people around you who can help you do that. Labor coaches should only include people you trust and don’t mind being naked or doing bodily functions in front of. That probably narrows the list down a little bit. Labor coaches should know your birth plan and/or expectations. They should be able to advocate for you and work with you through the process of labor and birth.
Doulas
There are also professional trained labor coaches available. For a fee, doulas provide individualized, continuous, and comprehensive support before, during and shortly after birth. I have worked with doulas throughout my career as a CNM and I have seen them make a huge difference for laboring women and their families. An effective doula is worth their weight in gold. If you are considering a doula make sure you meet with a few to insure they will meet your needs, include your other labor support in their approach, and be available when you need them. https://www.dona.org/what-is-a-doula/
Preparing for your hospital stay
A big step for preparing for birth is packing the hospital bag. My advice is to be thoughtful and brief. For an uncomplicated vaginal or c-section birth the hospital stay is usually only 2-3 days so leave the big suitcase at home.
Don’t:
Buy fancy PJs. You’re only going to get body fluids all over them. Use the provided hospital gowns and underwear for at least the first 24 hours after birth.
Bring a full complement of toiletries. Leave the majority of your morning preparations (make-up, curlers, etc) at home. You will be in the recovery phase for a few weeks so allow yourself some down time.
Bring your skinny jeans to wear home. You will not fit into them. Bring loose comfortable clothing. Your maternity clothing will still work well.
Bring a mini nursery for the baby. The hospital will supply basic supplies for the baby while in the hospital. Use those and leave yours at home. You really only need one weather appropriate outfit to bring the baby home in and one back-up outfit (for unplanned messes). Extra blankets, toys, little shoes, bows, etc. just get soiled or lost.
Do:
Bring your own basic toiletries including your toothbrush, travel size shampoo, soap, etc. Bring just enough to make you feel comfortable and normal.
Bring your own pillow(s). Hospitals NEVER have enough. Be sure to bring ones that you can part with if they are lost or soiled beyond salvation.
Make sure you have a safe and properly installed car seat for the baby. Hospital staff will not let the baby go home in anything else. Have a stocked diaper bag in the car for baby’s trip home
What every woman know should before labor/birth.
Labor and birth is EXTREMELY individual and unpredictable. My biggest pet peeve is every well-meaning friend and family member who must tell every newly pregnant woman their absolutely horrific birth story. DON’T LISTEN!!! This is your labor and birth and yours alone. Be informed and keep an open mind. Collect information and facts but don’t get caught up in others drama stories. Be flexible and know that labor may be tougher than you think so be ready to consider all of your options. Communicate, communicate, communicate with your provider and your labor support team.
Care and Coping during Labor
So now you are in labor. How long will this take? How much worse is it going to get? Unfortunately, there are really no answers to these questions. That’s what makes labor so intriguing. We know so much but labor really continues to mystify us. That’s why “going with the flow” is so important. Since I could write a book about coping with labor (and many have) I’m going to focus on the specific questions that were asked.
Eating in labor
Traditionally, in the hospital setting, woman have not been fed during labor. The biggest concern is complications of anesthesia administration (if needed) with a full stomach. However, there are randomized controlled trials that do not show any increase in adverse effects on maternal or neonatal outcomes with food consumption in labor. In my experience starving a patient does not facilitate labor and can make women pretty uncomfortable. Some birthing units will allow light meals during early labor and then limit intake as the labor progresses. Honestly, women in active labor are much less interested in food and if there are complications they are more apparent as labor progresses. The bottom line is that food intake during labor should be considered on a case by case basis and definitely not automatically ruled out.
Pain management
There is a multitude of pain management options available to cope with labor. Each setting or facility will have their own options for patients. The hospital setting will have the most options available. Intravenous pain medication and the epidural are the two most common options. There are pros and cons for both options. Informed decision-making is paramount in choosing what option is right for you. I have provided a comparison table to summarize the information.
Breech Birth
After many decades of breech birth the evidence is pretty undeniable that overall neonatal outcomes are better with c-section delivery. Vaginal breech deliveries are still performed but there are very few providers adept at vaginal breech birth. If a woman has a primary (first delivery) c-section for breech position there are still many providers that would consider a vaginal birth after c-section (VBAC) in this circumstance.
http://americanpregnancy.org/labor-and-birth/vbac/
After Birth
So now the baby’s out. What’s next? Believe it or not things that occur right after birth are EXTREMELY important.
Skin to Skin
I cannot say enough about skin to skin contact right after birth. There is so much new research that supports early skin to skin contact for mother and baby. The skin to skin not only facilitates closeness and bonding but it actually initiates the process of the breast milk composition to be tailored specifically to the baby’s immunologic needs. It’s called the “microbiome.” https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4686345/
Really interesting stuff!
Delayed cord clamping
This when the umbilical cord is not cut or clamped for several minutes (or when pulsation stops) after birth. I have actually given a mother oxygen and watched a newborn pink up with the umbilical cord still attached directly after birth. In general, delayed cord clamping is recommended if feasible. http://americanpregnancy.org/labor-and-birth/delayed-cord-clamping-risks-benefits/
Breastfeeding
Initiation and maintenance of breastfeeding can be a challenge, especially in the first few weeks. Make sure you have the support you need during your hospital stay and beyond. Most facilities provide lactation services to their new mothers. Know what your options are in your community. https://www.babyfriendlyusa.org/about-us/10-steps-and-international-code
http://www.ilca.org/why-ibclc/falc
Breast pump recommendations
It’s funny that this is one of the questions. Meg and I just went through this process. I work in an academic setting and I am surrounded by maternal child experts. Two of which are experience lactation consultants. Four experienced nurses (including the 2 lactation consultants) recommended the Medela portable double pump for general use. However, they also recommended a hospital grade (you can rent them) double breast pump for the first month after birth to establish a solid milk supply. Please note that I have no relationship with any company that sells breast pumps. Medela is widely available and parts/supplies are easy to obtain. It is also recommended to maintain individual use (meaning only you use your pump) and follow the pump instructions to maintain sanitization and cleanliness of the pump and supplies.
(Meg note: I was deciding between the Medela vs. the Spectra S1. All of my mom's LC friends/academic colleagues recommended the Medela and all of the working moms I spoke to recommended the Spectra (mostly because it is apparently much more quiet, it is hospital grade (stronger), kept its suction longer and is a 'closed' vs. open system). I am still undecided but found this review to be very helpful!
If you cannot or decide not to breastfeed
Your breasts do not know you are not going to use them for feeding. The natural process of preparing to feed a newborn will still occur to some extent. To decrease discomfort related to milk production and engorgement avoid breast stimulation. Wear a snug fitting sports bra most of the time and use icepacks and take Tylenol/ Motrin for comfort measures. Do not express milk or pump as this will continue to stimulate milk production. Over time your breasts will get the message that their services will not be needed. It may a few days to a week to get them on board with your plan.
Going Home
Everyone feels overwhelmed when they go home with this tiny being they are now responsible for. You are new parents and it is normal to feel unprepared. Give it time for you and your baby to get to know each other. Again, know your resources and accept any help that’s available… on your terms.
Rest and Recovery
As a new mother your primary responsibilities should be to care for and get to know your baby and to recover from birth. The majority of other tasks like sibling care, house work, errands, and cooking should be delegated to others as much as possible for the first few weeks. This will sound cliché but SLEEP WHEN THE BABY SLEEPS if you can. It does help when you are up several times a night with feedings.
Visitors
Well-meaning friends and family may just pop over to “help you take care of the baby” or just stand around not quite knowing what to do. This is what I tell all mothers going home from the hospital. Schedule your visitors! Figure out when you and the baby are at your best and have visitors come at that time. AND if they want to know what to do to help tell them to bring food (especially if that is their expertise). This really helps minimize this job for you and your visitors truly feel like they are helping you. It’s a win-win!
In summary...
I believe I have incorporated all of your questions in this extensive blog post. I will be glad to do a follow up post to address any additional questions that this information may bring to light!
Brenda M Gilmore DNP, CNM, FNP, CNE
CHOOSING A SHAMPOO & CONDITIONER WHILE PREGNANT
PREGNANCY & HAIR CARE
MRS.NIPPLE MAMA TIPS
When purchasing a shampoo and conditioner make sure the product is free of:
Sodium lauryl sulfate, a popular surfactant found in shampoos, has been linked to birth defects in animal studies.
Parabens
Synthetic fragrances which may contain phthalates (Phthalates may alter hormone levels)
The preservative, methylisothiazolinone (MIT) In scientific studies, MIT inhibited the growth of rats’ nerve cells
Pregnant or not, choosing a safe shampoo and conditioned is important because your hair follicles provide entry points into your skin, so these chemicals could easily enter your body. Keep in mind it's even more important you are confident in your hair care products because these are products you will be using on a weekly basis throughout your pregnancy. That being said, navigating the lists of ingredients on beauty products seems to be more of an art, something many of us do not want to spend time doing. Follain is the Sephora of chemical and toxin free beauty products. It takes the guess work out of questions like, "Is this product safe for my unborn baby" I buy most of my beauty products here because I have 100% confidence in their products. If you are local Organachs Farm to Skin in Westport CT is another great place to purchase chemical and toxic free beauty products.
MY ROUTINE
1. Less is more when it comes to daily hair care
2. I keep it as natural as possible with chemical free products
3. I also try and go as long as possible between washes. If I don't do an intense workout, with my thick coarse hair I can get by for about five days after a good blowout.
4. I try to let my hair air dry as much as possible. I blow out my hair around once or once every other week.
5. If I let my hair air dry but I have a meeting or event I just run a Drybar curling iron through it, SHOP HERE.
SHOP
NAME REGRET
NAME REGRET & MATERNITY
I want to point out that I love the name Charlie, and Charles Everett is a strong beautiful name, but i still have anxiety when looking back on our baby naming experience.
I hate the title of this post. It sounds terrible, but it is something some women really struggle with and it should be addressed. I was one of those women. Name regret is something that can be avoided. This is a two part series. The first part tells my story & the second part is an interview with name advice from Abby Sandel of Nameberry and Appellation Mountain.
MY STORY
My husband prefers traditional and I prefer modern names with roots. That's where the baby naming stress started. I finally found a family name I loved but my husband was not on board. At 6 months pregnant we had two long lists (girl/boy names) of many many options, however none stood out more than the others and there were many we just could not agree on. I finally got my husband on board to use the family name if we had a boy, but we still kept the long list of options open.
A week before I went into labor, I started second guessing my favorite name, the one that I had fought for. Would it suit him? Would he get made fun of? Is it the right name? I also felt like I couldn't ask other people their opinions because I didn't want them to say they hated it. At that moment I made my biggest mistake, I turned to someone I always turn to when in doubt, my mother. Usually, she is the perfect person for advice but she has a very traditional style. I wanted her to tell me she loved the name, I just needed some reassurence.
I told her the name, and.......
"WHAT?! That is a terrible name!?."
I started to panic. There was so much about to change in my life and I needed support in that moment. It's not her fault, she is allowed to have an opinion. I started seriously looking into other names and we ended up bringing a list to the hospital, four names for girls, four names for boys, even though my favorite was still a front runner. We figured we would see the baby and know what the name should be. If only it were that easy...
Fast forward and we are presented with a beautiful baby boy, and the first question was, what is his name? In that moment, all of that anxiety that had been tucked away for the last week came back. I just had the craziest experience in my life (delivering a baby) and now I have to pick a lifelong name? Oh, and by the way, you are on the clock and only have 48 hours. I always pictured my baby to have dark hair and he came out a redhead. Would my very Irish name be too Irish for a red head? Does he actually look like the name I loved for him? What if everyone hates it? As a first time mom, I didn't realize how much my baby would change. I was trying to fit a name to this little infant and I was feeling very overwhelmed. My husband decided we should sleep on, it so we did. I woke up and didn't feel any closer to a final decision, so we started asking nurses and doctors, even the guy who delivered my breakfast. We had a white board in our room with a tally. No! I'm not joking. We narrowed it down to two names, our original and one name we didn't even go to the hospital with. Much of my uncertainty came from that conversation the previous week. We ended up going with the new name and everything seemed great. Fast forward 2 days later and I woke up with anxiety that we had picked the wrong name.
Then I started thinking, is this a form of PPD? Is this normal? I want to love his name! Why don't I? Has this happened to anyone else? I didn't know where to turn so I reached out to the founders of Nameberry and....they responded to my email. (I just looked back at my email and I truly sounded like a crazy person) Yet, I knew I couldn't fix this, but I needed to know how to make it right for baby #2. They told me this very same thing, that happened to me, happens to many people.
I love the name Charlie. I can't imagine our baby as any other name, I just wish it was a less stressful experience.
Here are some tips I learned from my experience to help others that are having trouble picking a name.
MRS. NIPPLE BABY NAMING TIPS
- Go with your gut
- If you know someone has a completely different style than you, it might be better not to share the name with them
-I personally think you should wait to share the name until after your baby is born
-Start having the baby name conversation early so you can test it out with your partner
- Pick a first name then pick a middle name. Don't compare first and middle names when choosing. You really don't use middle names.
INTERVIEW WITH ABBY SANDEL
Now that I'm pregnant with baby #2, I reached out to Abby Sandel, the name guru. That also happens to be the senior editor and resident name sage of Nameberry and founder of the name blog, Appellation Mountain. I wanted to get the right tips and advice from a name specialist. She also offers professional advice to couples who are struggling with naming their baby. FUN FACTS: Her kids names are, Alex and Clio. Alexander Arthur (He has resisted all attempts by Abby to use a more creative nickname.) He just turned 13. (HOW?!) and Clio - Claire Caroline Wren. (She's cool with all the crazy nicknames, and then some.) She's 9. And name-obsessed! Abby's top pick for a 2018 baby for herself would be Leif Christopher Clark for a boy (my children think this name is bananas) and Rosemary "Romy" or Theodora "Thora" - or maybe Marguerite, for a girl.
My Interview with Abby:
1) Where should you start when trying to find the perfect name?
Many couples have an idea about favorite names and jump right in to the process. That can work out beautifully ... or it can result in deadlock, when it turns out that their preferences are miles apart.
For any couple who is stuck or just not sure where to begin, I'd recommend starting with your own names. Have you always liked having a family name? Does it bother you if your name is too unusual/too common? Tough to spell or pronounce? You might be new to naming a child, but you're not new to having a name. Draw on that life experience to reflect on the kind of name you'd like your child to have.
Then consider qualities that you want in a child's name. These aren't rules - and families I work with often don't follow the guidelines they identify. But it's a good place to start. Talking about qualities is neutral; arguing about whether or not to honor your beloved grandmother is not.
So discuss up front: do you want to use family names? Do you want to follow specific naming traditions, like choosing saints' names if you're Catholic? Honor a specific background, whether it's Irish or Pakistani? How do you feel about nicknames? Does the name need to work in more than one language? Are there names that you love - even if you can't use them - that can help define the kind of name you'd like your child to have?
If you're naming a second child, you might want to avoid repeating first initials. Or if you honored one side of the family with your firstborn's middle name, it might feel really important to choose a middle from the other side this time around.
2) What things should someone think about when naming a baby?
We name strangers. It's impossible to know who our children will grow up to be, so building in some flexibility in a name is a good thing. If you're choosing a really unusual first name, consider a more traditional or mainstream middle. (Azalea Eleanor is likely a better choice than Azalea Finch.)
We focus on how our peers perceive names - but our children will grow up with their generation. Names like Ellis and Thea will be ordinary for kids born today. That means that you can safely ignore much of what your friends (and random strangers on message boards) say about names. This is doubly true for our parents and grandparents. Much as we love them, we probably don't share the same taste in names. The names of the mid-1960s were Julie, Tammy, and Michelle; Scott, Jeffrey, and Brian. So a normal name to our parents is not likely to be a favorite for us today, and that's fine.
Know that you can't control nicknames indefinitely. Sure, you can insist that Henry is Henry. But if he comes home freshman year answering to Hank, that's his choice. If you love a name, but dislike the default nickname, it might be a problem. Telling everyone that your son is William, not Will? That's a recipe for frustration.
Meaning matters - but not necessarily in the etymological sense. The best insulation against name regret is having a story about why the name appealed to you. It doesn't have to be a made-for-TV tale of going into labor right after hiking in some scenic park and deciding to name the baby for the trail. But knowing why you chose the name is powerful.
3) What if a couples style in baby names is drastically different?
This happens ALL the time.
First, know that compromise isn't a bad thing. There's a good chance that you'll come to love your child's name as your child grows. Many parents say things like, "Oh I wasn't sure about naming our son after Grandpa Marvin, but now the name suits him perfectly."
Accept that you may have to give up your favorite names. Yes, even if you've been keeping a list since you were twelve.
Look for places where you do overlap. Maybe you like your names long and vintage, while your partner prefers short and modern. Maybe you can find a short, but vintage name, like Vera or Ada? Or a name that sounds modern, like Arlo, but has lots of history, too.
I've heard it called "narrowing up" - instead of looking for reasons to reject the names on your list, look for positive reasons to embrace them. It elevates the conversation, and helps you identify why a name appeals so strongly.
4) When choosing names for siblings, should they all flow?
I think the most important part when naming siblings isn't flow, but balance.
Unless you're the Von Trapps or the Jacksons, most of your life is led independently, and many friends and colleagues won't know your sibling's names - or if you have siblings.
But children - at least some of the time - may notice if their names are very different. If your firstborn will be named for a family member, what makes your second child's name special? If one child has a really unusual name, and the other a very popular one, is there a story that you can tell both kids when they ask?
Flow is a helpful concept in this sense: when you say your children's names together, does it sound right to you? Because you will say your kids' names together, dozens of hundreds of times. And if you trip over the names, that's a signal that you need to rethink. Maybe the names share too many sounds, or maybe one is much longer than the others. Those are the kind of differences you may be able to live with - but you should make a deliberate decision rather than discover it after you've brought home your newborn!
5) If you could give one piece of advice around naming a baby what would it be?
Use the name you love.
Yes, even if it's very popular, or rather obscure. Even if it breaks the rules you read online, or even if others tell you it's just awful. When you and your partner find The Name, you'll know. Don't let yourself be talked out of it.
6) What is your advice around choosing between two names you love?
That's so hard! If time allows, I'd try testing them both: writing them out by hand, plugging them into those design-your-own sites online to see how they look embroidered on a backpack, and calling your baby by that name for a few days. The coffee shop test can work, too - in any situation when someone asks for your name, give your favorites - and see if one feels better.
The issue here is that often one parent prefers Logan, while the other has her heart set on Landon. There's no substantial difference, just a slight preference. When that happens, sometimes reading about the names can reveal a fact that sways you in one direction or the other. A meaning might resonate with you both, or a famous figure by the name.
Lastly, there's something to be said for giving in to the person who cares more. We didn't do this when naming our son - I clamped down on my instinct to over-analyze it, and we went with the first name we agreed on. (I spent the first few weeks suggesting that we change his middle name.) With our daughter, I thought and re-thought the decision. My husband knew it was super important to me, and realized that we were talking about adding a second middle name - trivial to him, critical to me, and so there was no reason not to do it my way.
7) Should the opinions of others matter?
In one sense, yes. If you're choosing an unusual name, it's worth checking whether others can pronounce it. Or whether they'll pronounce it in a way that sounds all wrong to your ears. So a little bit of road-testing is good - but that doesn't need to be with your friends and family. You can give your favorite name to a barista at a coffee shop and see how that works.
But generally, no. Everybody has opinions about baby names. But those who are changing the diapers and waking up at 3 am, they're the ones who get to choose.
If you are interested in a name consultation session with Abby you can reach her through email, appmtn@gmail.com. Please email for rates.
OTHER RESOURCES
Links for advice articles:
https://appellationmountain.net/articles/
https://nameberry.com/blog/baby-naming-advice
https://appellationmountain.net/eight-things-ive-learned-about-baby-names-as-a-parent/
THE PERFECT WINTER TO SPRING LOO
STYLE
I'm going to keep this short and sweet. I love wearing white in winter, I love boyfriend jeans and I love a jacket with detail.
JEANS
I've been wearing Citizen boyfriend jeans for a few years and they are my favorite. I love the detailing on this pair. It's the perfect amount of white with just the right touch of ivory.
SWEATER
This is a classic you can keep for years. Sometimes it's hard to find just the right whites in winter for white on white looks. These two pieces work well together
Jacket
This jacket is on major sale and I'm hooked. It's works well for layering during the winter months and is the perfect jacked that can be worn during that transition time from winter to spring. I also love the pink hood and fringe. Oh, and it's on MAJOR sale.